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macmerk9
Help Me Everyone Please?
my friend, who cuts herself, need alot of help. yes she's also the one who was raped and is now pregnant (see my other question) she called me on her cell phone and told me she was in her room cutting herself so i called the home phone and told her parents. now she is pissed off. i thought i did the right thing! what now? how can i get her to stop cutting herself and get help?
Additional Details
she already is getting professional help but she is determined to tell me it's not working. is she just attention starved?
                     




penile_16
drugs? maybe she needs a psychiatrist? that seems reasonable. I know most drugs like that are safe during pregnancy


Sh0rty_B_Fly15
just continue being there for her and letting her know everything will be okay. of course she's gonna be mad.. but she'll thank you later for it.


agamamama
Rating
You did the right thing. Yes, she needs help. Can you find a Yahoo! group for people who cut themselves and get advice? I know there are support groups for different things out there, like teen pregnancy and hair-pulling compulsion. Surely there is one for self-mutilation. Those people can give you the best advice, besides, of course, a professional.


melissa81478
Rating
Unfortunately, the only thing you can do is exactly what you did. Call someone who is WITH her to physically STOP her from hurting herself.

You can't help her stop cutting, only a professional can help her sort out her thoughts and feelings, and help her direct them in a constructive way.

You can, however, continue to be her friend. Be there for her night or day.

Until she gets professional help (like I did when I cut) try this. Every time she gets the urge to cut, have her snap a rubber band on her wrist. If the urge is still there (this is what I did, and still do) get a huge handful of nails, a board, and a hammer. Hammer nails into the board until your arm is tired, until the need to cut has passed.

Please don't give up on her, and please know you did the right thing by letting her parents know what's going on.


eL
bring her to a counselor


Spirit Guide
Rating
You have done the best thing. A real friend would want
the best thing to happen and that is just what you did.
She needs real help and the only way to do that is to
let her parents know what she is saying and doing.


Connie
you indeed did the right thing. i have a friend years ago


eminaymuzik01
Rating
Hey hun, ok here we go, ive dealt with this before, and its not cool.
people who usually cut them selfs just want attention, why do you think she called you? i had a friend that never did drugs and still cut her self. you need to explain to her, try to get more firneds with her, and hang out.. keep her mind off of cutting her self.
hope that works for you, it did for me..


dkr
if your her true friend you need to call the cops 'cause she might succeed in killing her self now or next time.please intervene even if it means she doesn't want to be your friend.

good luck in finding a solution.


Bogusfrog
Rating
Intervention is a good thing, and you did right. Let her be mad, it's better than the alternative. Besides, if she called you, she obviously wanted help. Just continue to be a good friend to her. But it sounds like her parents are the ones who need to get her into counseling.


mtlfearie
i think u did the right thing...if something would have happened, you would have never been able to forgive urself....plz tell me her parents are doing something about it...she needs professional help ASAP


ptmamas
Rating
you DID DO THE RIGHT THING ...she is just upset right now and who can blame her ..she is going threu so much right now ..give her some time. honestly she probably told you she was cutting hersel in hopes that you would tell someone ..maybe she wanted to stop but didnt know how to .


Safira
Assuming her parents aren't known to be part of the problem, you did exactly the correct thing. She needs professional help and if her parents are unaware of the extent of the situation, they can't get her the help she needs. There is little you can do except to be there for her as a friend and keep telling her that there are people out there who have helped other cutters stop cutting. She is angry with you now because now she has to deal with the problem face on and because of her mental state, cutting herself is easier than dealing with the underlying issues. If her parents get involved now and take her for professional help, eventually she will be grateful that you brought her parents to awareness.


Lizzard
this is a dangerous situation. the good side is that she called to tell you. This means she wants help, she hasn't lost all hope, and she's probably open to change.
The bad part is if she is pushed to hard she may do something that she can't take back.
She is blaming herself for what happened to her, and she feels like she has no control over her life. this is a way for her to control something, punish herself, and show the pain she is experiencing.
You need to call a help line or try one of these sites:


kaitlyn399
Rating
Get her to seek medical help....And if she called you on the phone and told you she was cutting herself then she wnat's attention...(my guess) And she wanted you to respound by coming over there and comforting her and you contacted the wrong people and now she's mad it was nothing you did!!!!


bettyboop
You took the first step and told her parents. You can't get her to stop. She needs professional help. Obviously, she has issues that she can't cope with. What Now? Hopefully her parents will see how disturbed she really is and get her some help.


Orlando57
Rating
thats similar to an attempted suicide its a cry for help-attention tell her to get a counselor at school or at the public mental health clinic tell her you care and want her to be truly happy and the activity is scareing you and her family good luck a former crisus line worker


chiefof nothing
Rating
Hey you started helping already..next step talk with her parents and let them know this is an ongoing problem and she needs counseling/treatment..If they drop the ball talk to a school counselor..I'm guessing you are still in school.. It's better to have a friend mad at you if she gets good help to resolve her cutting problem...If you end up losing her as a friend it doesn't matter as long as she gets well! My guess is in that case, with time to realize your intentions were all for her health, you'll be even better friends...


?
No matter what, you did the right thing. Her parents need to know what is going on, or they can't help her. That is a very serious thing. Are your parents aware of the problem. My concern is for you also. If for some unfortunate reason she actually does succeed in really hurting herself, you need to realize that it is not your fault. She has problems that are serious and she needs professional help. You are carrying a heavy responsibility that really shouldn't be shouldered by you. Please sit down and not only talk with your parents but hers also, it all needs to come out. She has to be confronted in order to get her the help she needs. And you know and realize that. Hang in there and just know that you can not fix her problems. Just try to be there the best that you can, but it really does need adult intervention.


unlearn34
You did the right thing. Sometimes being a true friend means risking the friendship, maybe sometime in the future she will realize you were one of the true ones. God bless you.


♫♥GCchick♥♫
wow. u need to leave that to her parents. hopefully they can get the help she needs. also if she's pissed at u then u need to realize she shuldnt be. eventually she'll most likely thank u. but right now talk to ur parents about it. and make sure her parents are doning someting for her. u need to talk to her and tell her u dont like her cutting herself.
=)


Jessica
you did the right thing by telling her parents
maybe you should sit down with the parents and talk about it together
that way you are all trying to help her
and dont make it seem like you are judging her or attacking her or anything
you need to make it seem like you are on her side and you want to do what is in her best interests
maybe she could see a counselor and get professional help


solomae
You did the right thing.She needs counseling desperately.People who cut themselves are trying to divert their emotional pain to physical pain.


Lisetteâ„¢
Rating
Oh my...That's terrible but I think you did the right thing. Don't worry if she's pissed off with you. She'll understand one day that you only did that because you care for her and you just wanted to help her. As for the cutting, you said that you already called her parents and told them. They should've done something about it. Though maybe right now they are also confused. Talk to them and see if you can help. Try suggesting to them about taking your friend to a good counselor. You are a great and true friend, you know. She's lucky to have you. :) Good luck and God bless!


Brown Suga
i think u should have tried to talk sum sense into her first instead of telling her parents then if that didnt work tell them and try to get her sum help


AnimalsFan
Rating
u might want to keep out her business. I understand that people suffer a lot. But I believe that maybe she should go to a therapy. Just to talk about her suffering and take it all out. She should calm down ASAP and believe that u did the right thing. Don't worry too much. Everything will be fine...for sure.


ctf1800
you did the right thing and she needs some serious help, I think she is acting out and is trying to find who she can trust and how she cant, but if you a true friend stay by her and try to talk to her.


cdf-rom
You did the right thing. Don't let her manipulate you through guilt, she needs to be helped and protected from herself, and you did that. Someday, she will realize what a true and faithful friend you are.


jadednihilist
If you thought her life was in danger then you did the right thing! Don't let anyone tell you different!!!

It was a cry for help, no matter what she may say now she'll thank you after she gets the help she needs. Trust me my best in high school was anorexic and bulimic and I told on her because I love her, man was she angry then. when she'd finished treatment she gave me a big hug and told me how thankful she was. I'll never forget that.

Keep telling until you are sure that she is getting the help she needs, if she didn't want help she wouldn't have told you or anyone else.


gsschulte
you did the right thing feel no guilt. you did what you thought best for your friend. she needs to seek counceling for the rape and then for the cutting she is most likely numb with all of this comeing at her at once. if she talk to you again tell her that you do not like her like this and that you want ther to get help because you cannot help her or be around her if she is like this.


Jessthemess
Rating
Get help. Later she'll thank you because she has a later.


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