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 Do u think that a person who takes 5 cigarettes per day is somker or not ?
i heared couple of days ago from friend that 5 cigarettes per day or less man has been taken,,, don't represent him as smoker.so anyone read that in reports ?? or has reliable ...


 Does Weed cause cancer?
...


 How long do people with lung cancer live?
dad been diagnosed with lung cancer starting chemo and radio therapy 5 day treatment. on morphine 5ml 4 times a ...


 Can i die of cancer if i don't smoke?
...


 Cancer reliable CURE, remedy, relief ?
...


 My mothers doctors have told us that she has 4-6 weeks to live due to brain cancer, should we tell her or not?
she knows shes not 100% but dont know that nothing more can be done, shes talking about things she is goin to do when she get out of hospital ...


 A friend of ours has cancer given 1yr to 18months to live boy what do i say to him ?
...


 Why isn't cigarette smoking illegal?
I understand A LOT of people smoke cigarettes....but that isn't my question...why don't they make it illegal with all the health hazards it causes to the smoker, and those around the smoker....


 I have asked a question about cancer. My next question is; is there life after death?
...


 I am 14 and i am a chain smoker any advice on how to cut down?
i have smoked for 2 years started when i got into alot of trouble and i dont want to quit all together i jus wanna slow dwn if dat makes ani sence 2 ya i tried lines and da nhs trust fings dnt ceem 2 ...


 Can men get breast Cancer?
Can men get breast cancer? my honey has a right swollen nipple that is very tender... Could it be a systs?
Im not j/k....


 Need a team name! help?!?
FORMING A GIRLS TEAM FOR THE BREAST CANCER 3 DAY WALK IN NOVEMBER AND WE NEED HELP WITH A TEAM NAME....
SOMETHING TO DO WITH GIRLS, PINK, WALKING, ETC.
SOMETHING LIKE THAT....
LET ME KN...


 Have you or anyone u known had cancer?
hey... recently a family member has been told they have 6 months to live as she has jst discovered she has cancer in her stomach and its spread to the liver... the doctor says she has 6 months to ...


 Does having a LOW white cell count mean you COULD possibly have leukemia?
...


 I will be starting my first cycle of chemo next monday?
i have stage 2 ovarian cancer i have to do 6 cycles of chemo (or more it depends) and i will taking Bleomycin, etoposide, and cisplatin. All meds have hair loss as their side effects. I have ...


 Bowel cancer? can it cure itself?
I have a Christain friend who has bowel cancer, he's not going to go for an operation as he said that he is going to pray to God to cure him, and that God will answer his prays,,, I think that ...


 Grieving the loss of my Mom?
My Mom lost her battle to Ovarian Cancer a month ago today. Right after she past I did cry, and felt that I missed her, but part of me couldn't fully let go and release my emotions. I still ...


 My dad and his father before him they had colone cancer, i'm 30 years old what should i do?
my dad and his father before him they had colone cancer, i'm 30 years old what should i do?...


 I'm 14 and I think I may have/be at risk for colon cancer??
Well my dad's dad died of Colon Cancer in March. He had a tumor the size of a soccer ball. MY dad probably has it because he's always constipated and he bleeds while on the toilet. Maybe ...


 I have cancer and im scared?
i just found out i have ca of the uterus and cervix, and im still shocked by the news. have to see a ca dr next week to see about surgery. i am so depressed about it, all i do is cry. my husband ...



fran p
My brother has cancer only 2 months left im finding it hard to cope?
im just devastated
Additional Details
thanks olivia its appreciated
                     




Vogon Poet
Rating
We had two bereavments in the family last year from Cancer and it's still an open wound.

Make sure your brother knows he's part of your life and tough as it might seem respect his wishes. He's having to come to terms with it as well.

Make sure that you'll have no regrets like 'I wish I'd told him xxxxxx'

On a positive note cancer is a slow death and it does at least give you the chance to say goodbye, sudden deaths leave you with a sense of being robbed of that final chance.

My best wishes to you, your brother and your families.


ruby*cat
Rating
My brother died at the age of 38 from cancer. He died very peacefully and I'm glad of that, but I didn't say all I wanted to or should have. I often have dreams about him and I have said all the important things to him in those dreams. Who knows how dreams work? I've woken up crying and I've woken up happy after these dreams. So you maybe have to think that even though his body will be gone, he will live on in your subconscious and you will be able to talk to him there.


ladybird 21
dear fran, i would like to be able to say to you i understand what's happening to you but i cant. it must be the most devastating thing to happen to you and your family. the only person close to me who died from this horrid disease are my gran parents and that broke my heart. i can only say to you what i would do if it were me, i would tell my brother how much i love him and that i will always remember the great times we spent together having fun and lots of laughs. i would want to spend the next 2 months doing the thing we never got round to doing, that's if he is feeling up to it. even just sitting and chatting and spending time with him would be great. im so sorry fran it must be the worst time ever for and your family i want to send you my prayer's. god bless


kevin
First of all I will pray to God to give you a lot of strength to cope with this situation. I think the best thing would be to accept the facts and try your best to make best of whatever is left for your brother. I know it is easy to say but hard to do, but I think it is the only way. I am sure your brother did some really good deeds in his last life and this time he was sent to this earth only to complete what was left in his last life. Be strong and have faith in yourself, and your strength might help your brother as well.


Phoenix
Fran dear, I'm so sorry.
There's a lot of good advice in these messages.
There are just a couple of things I'd like to add. I've worked with quite a number of grieving people and I promise you, It does get better with time - provided that you let it out! Talk to people. Cry when you want to cry. You'll remember good times, funny times - so, laugh when you want to laugh as well. (That sounds strange, but it will happen). You may feel guilty, angry. They'll pass. Just talk them out.
There is a book which I reccommend to anyone who is facing death - their own or that of a loved one. It's called 'Grace and Grit' by Ken Wilber. You might like to try it.
So - deepest sympathy m'dear. And all good wishes for your future.
Jon C


Candy
I've been through this with my friend she lost both her parents very recently to cancer and i lost my sister 6 months ago. It is not easy trying to cope, i had to tell me self over and over that for my sister it was best for her no more suffering no more pain. I'ts very hard to let go of the ones we love. Life will get better and you will find a way to cope. Be strong for your brother. Talk to your friends and hopefully they will help you through the sad time ahead. Thinking of you


animalwatch
Rating
Im so sorry,both for you and your brother.

It's heartbreaking watching someone you love,just fade away. I know I lost my mum when I was 29 to cancer.

I have also had breast cancer myself, and know the terrible fears that go through you.
Hopefully,I haven't got it anymore,and won't get it back,there's never l00% guarantee of this though.So every day is prescious, or should be.

Unfortunately, there is nothing I can do to help your brother,but I do hope you might find some comfort in knowing that there are people out her that understand your sorrow and care.

God bless you and your brother,where he goes,there is no pain.


thomas_higbee54
Rating
I'm sorry you have to go through this, try to focus on the positive things you did together. If possible talk to him a lot, share your memories and the things you never told him. Ask him for advice on anything it will help him and you. He knows you love him now take the time you have to show him. It is going to be very hard for both of you but you can get through it.


Linda B
Rating
I know it is difficult for you, but you must put him first right now, you can fall apart later....spend as much time as you can with him, it is okay to cry in his presence and tell him how you feel, it will allow him to share how he is really feeling and it will bond the two of you forever.....do things for him that are special, rent movies that he really likes, play music he really likes, fix foods he can eat and make them funny, because I'm sure he can't eat a lot. Like put a face on a pear or potatoe, stupid things like that...Get his friends over to spend time with him, tape a sporting event that maybe he is missing because he is sick, read to him if he was a reader, keep him abreast of what is happening in school or at work, above all let him talk about all his fears...........this is so important.....assure him you are there for him and will be till the end.....afterwards is your time...fall apart, cry, scream, curse, hit the wall, kick your bed, anything you have to do to get the anger out of yourself....the hurt and pain will take a long while and at first it will be hard to breath, but it will get better I promise you....God's speed to your brother, and God bless to you sweetheart......


allgiggles1984
Rating
aww hun i am so sorry. My cousin's mum going through same thing. I just want to comfort you and tell you to be strong. i knw it's easier said than done but i suppose we all gotta go someday but be strong for you and for him and show him u care and love him with all your heart and that spend as much time caring for him and looking after him coz u only have one chance. take it and use it even if it means leaving your job for a few months in helping out.


WitchTwo
Rating
Reading the bible may give you some comfort. I know that sounds like a stupid answer to a lot of people but it may help you in your grief. Hospice offers a lot of coping skills, they are experienced in helping people prepare for death......they make you see that you can prepare for it.....that the person dying can be ready to let go of this world.....email me if you like. You have to talk about it, feel it......and let go of the fear. We all are going to die, death is a release from a rather painful existance on earth...it should be rejoiced, sad yes, but rejoice none the less when he passes for he goes to a better place, and trust me, you will know that he is still with you, watching you. Be happy for him.....help him prepare.....I know its hard, but you can do it.


LEX
Words are hard to find here, Wish i could be more help.Can only say that my feelings are with you and your posed question hit me with a tonne of lead and i felt the need to comment, no i haven't said anything thats of any use to you, i'm now wondering how i end my answer? Sorry i can't.


Brittany
Im so sorry but heres something to help you.



What to Expect if Your Loved One Has Cancer
If someone you love has cancer, you're feeling many emotions. You may feel sad, angry, and confused. It's OK to feel this way. Cancer is a serious disease, and your loved one will need to see the doctor a lot. It can help to learn more about what cancer is, how it is treated, and how it will affect their and your life. If you have any questions about your loved one's cancer, first ask your loved one, but you can also ask a relative, a doctor, or a nurse.


What Is Cancer?
Cancer is when one of your body's cells starts to divide out of control, making many cells. These cells can create a lump called a tumor. Or, if cancer is in the blood (leukemia), the cancer cells grow out of control and push out the normal cells. This makes it hard for the healthy cells to fight infection, help stop bleeding, and carry oxygen throughout your body.

Doctors and nurses are not always sure why cancer occurs. This is especially true with childhood cancers. But they do know the causes of some types of cancers. For example, doctors know that smoking can cause lung cancer. You can't catch cancer like you can catch a cold. People can die from cancer, but every year doctors are discovering new ways to help people survive cancer. It's also important to remember that you cannot cause someone to get cancer. Just because you were mad at your father or didn't help your grandmother, does not mean that you caused their cancer.

Treatment
There are more than 100 different kinds of cancer. Treatment for each type of cancer is different and even two people who have the same type of cancer can receive different kinds of treatment. Your loved one may have to go to the hospital or a cancer center for treatment and stay there for a while. Or, your loved one may go to a clinic a few times a week for treatment.

There are four main types of treatment for cancer: surgery, radiation, chemotherapy, and biological therapy. Many times, people have to have more than one type of treatment to destroy the cancer. For example, someone may have surgery and then radiation to kill any leftover cancer cells that surgery did not remove.

If you are curious about your loved one's treatment, you may want to ask if you can go with them to a clinic visit or any of the other appointments they may have. Your loved one may not want you to come, or he or she may be happy that you're interested. If you go, it will also give you a chance to meet your loved one's doctors and nurses and ask them questions.

Surgery. Doctors use surgery to remove the tumor and, if able, some of the tissue around the tumor, which may have cancer in it. If your loved one has surgery, he or she will have to stay in the hospital to recover. He or she may be there overnight, for just a few days, or longer.

Radiation. This is when a radiologist, a type of doctor, aims high-energy, radioactive rays at a tumor. Some people who have had radiation say that it's almost like getting an x-ray. If your loved one has radiation, he or she will have to go to the hospital or clinic to get it. He or she will probably have to go a few times a week for treatment. Radiation is usually not painful while it's happening.

Chemotherapy. Your loved one may get strong, cancer-fighting medicine, called chemotherapy, which can destroy cancer cells. Sometimes your loved one takes a pill. Other times, your loved one has to have a shot or get medicine through an IV. (An IV is a special tube that can go in the arm, chest, or another part of the body.) Depending on the type of chemotherapy, your loved one may have to go to the hospital or clinic to get it.

Biological therapy. Doctors use special substances, sometimes called interleukins, interferons, growth factors, and colony-stimulating factors, to fight cancer. These substances help the immune cells fight infection and disease. Your loved one may get biotherapy through a shot, an IV, or have an operation. Your loved one may have to go to the hospital or clinic for treatment, depending on the type of biotherapy he or she gets.

What Are Side Effects?
Some cancer treatments, such as radiation, chemotherapy, and biotherapy, have side effects. Side effects occur when the treatment, in trying to kill the cancer cells, kills healthy cells. Not everyone has side effects, and side effects depend on the type of cancer and treatment. Side effects usually go away when treatment ends, but some can be permanent. Common side effects include:

fatigue

nausea

vomiting

depression

fever

skin rash

blood problems

hair loss

Hair loss is one of the most shocking side effects because we're used to seeing people with hair. Hair usually grows back when treatment ends. If your loved one loses his or her hair, he or she may wear a wig or a scarf to protect the scalp. Or, your loved one may not wear anything. This may make you feel uncomfortable. Talk to your loved one about how you feel. You may even decide to shave your head so that you and your loved one are bald together!

What's Going to Happen to Me?
If your loved one has cancer, your life is going to change. Here are some things you can expect.

Helping out. You may have to help out more around the house if your loved one has cancer. For example, you may have to watch your younger brother or sister, or clean the house. Your loved one will appreciate it if you can help. But, you may feel frustrated with having more things to do and less time to spend with your friends. If you feel like you are doing too much, talk about it with someone.

Missing loved ones. When a loved one has cancer, he or she may be away from home for stretches of time, depending on the type of cancer and the treatment. And if a loved one is away from home a lot, chances are, another loved one is too. For example, if your mother has cancer, your father may also be away, at the hospital or working extra hours. Your well parent or the rest of your family and friends may also feel stressed out and may not have as much time for you.

Special treatment. If your brother or sister has cancer, it may feel like they get special treatment. In a way, they have to because they are sick. But sometimes it can be frustrating because you may get in trouble for doing something and your brother or sister won't. Your parents probably want to do all they can for your sick brother or sister. It may seem like they get away with things because they are sick. It doesn't seem fair, but try not to let it bother you.

Friends. Your friends may feel funny around you because your loved one has cancer. They may fear upsetting you, so they don't ask about your relative with cancer. Or, they may not understand cancer, and tease you about it or think that they could catch it from you. It may help you to talk to your friends. But there may be times when you don't want to talk about your loved one's cancer or see your friends. That's OK, but try to reach out to your friends so that they know you still care about them. It's important to see your friends.

Talking about cancer. If you feel sad, frustrated, or angry about your loved one's cancer and its effect on you, talk to someone. You loved one's cancer center may have support groups for teens, where you can talk to other teens who are in similar situations. Or, you may find it helpful to talk to a counselor on your own.

What Will Happen to My Family?
Many people today survive cancer, but some people do not. For some people who survive cancer, sometimes cancer can come back. You may wonder what will happen to your family if their cancer comes back or if your loved one dies.

Death. When a loved one has cancer, there is a chance that he or she will die. You may be very scared about this. Your loved one is probably scared too. If one of your parents has cancer, you may wonder what will happen to you if that parent dies. Chances are, your ill parent has thought about that. Talk about how you feel. If you feel funny talking about death with your loved one who has cancer, talk to someone else, such as your other parent, a relative, or a teacher.

Cancer returns. Sometimes doctors think that they have cured cancer, but it comes back. When cancer comes back to the same spot, it's called a recurrence. If cancer comes back and spreads to another part of the body, it's called metastasis. For very few people, a new cancer can develop after the first cancer is cured. This is called a second cancer. When cancer recurs or spreads, it usually means that the cancer is serious, and your loved one will probably need stronger treatment. Again, it's important to talk about how you feel. It may help to talk to a counselor.

When someone you love has cancer, it can feel like your world is falling apart. It may be hard to do everyday things, such as going to school or meeting your friends at the mall. But just as it is important for you to help out your family during this difficult time, it's also important to help yourself, by talking about how you feel and doing everyday things.

Author(s):
Couto, Suzanne
Date Last Modified: 10/26/2005


[email protected]
Rating
time is precious treat him to something he could only dream of make his last moments the best he has ever had


crumcake422
So very sorry about your brother. My husband passed away from lung cancer in June. He went thru all the treatments, radiation, chemo, gamma knife procedure, and took a drug called Tarceva. He was diagnosed March 20th. He had no symptoms. It is the worst thing I have ever been thru in my life. I have to stay strong for the kids but that is the only reason I am still here. You are NEVER prepared for your loved one to go NEVER No matter how many times the doctor told us how long I did not believe them. He fought so hard. Try to stay strong and hang in there for your family It is very tough but I will be thinking you good thoughts.


kalbri3
Rating
Right now you need to put as much as possible into these last days and make them pain and guilt free( yes they feel guilt at leaving).It won't be easy but in the end you will know you have done your best to make this time better and your brother more at peace.It's hard to let go. In the end you take care of yourself, go to a support group or a best friend, you can go to these now but you will need them more later.This is a very emotional roller coaster of emotions and can require professional help don't be afraid to ask.I to have lost loved one to cancer 3 in 1 year
You have my sympathy


DR ROB
FIRSTLY, MAY I BEGIN BY SAYING HOW SORRY I AM ABOUT YOUR BROTHER'S DIAGNOSIS.

CANCER IS NEVER AN EASY THING TO DEAL WITH, WHETHER YOU'RE THE PATIENT, A RELATIVE...ITS EVEN HARD FOR THE DOCTOR.

YOU'RE PROBABLY IN A STATE OF MENTAL TURMOIL, BUT THIS WILL BE BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN FORCED TO THINK ABOUT SO MANY THINGS AT ONCE BY THE DIAGNOSIS AND SO IN THE FIRST INSTANCE, I WOULD SUGGEST SPEAKING TO YOUR GP AS REGARDS COUNCELLING, TO HELP YOU PLACE THE MUDDLE OF INFORMATION YOU'RE TRYING TO DEAL WITH ON THE TABLE SO YOU CAN WORK THROUGH THINGS ONE AT A TIME.

SECONDLY, NO MATTER HOW MUCH DOCTORS TRY TO GIVE A FIGURE ON HOW LONG A PERSON HAS, UNLESS ITS IN THE DYING PHASE, WE CAN VERY INACCURATE. THEREFORE, THE FIGURE OF TWO MONTHS GIVEN BY THE DOCTOR MAY BE WRONG. PREPARE FOR THE WORST, HOPE FOR THE BEST, BUT AT ALL TIMES, VALUE EVERY SECOND YOU HAVE LEFT WITH HIM. DO THE THINGS THAT ARE WORTH WHILE FOR YOU ALL AND MAKE HIM UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH YOU ALL LOVE HIM (BUT DON'T OVERDO IT FOR YOUR OWN SAKE).

YOU CAN'T CHANGE THE OUTCOME OF THE SITUATION - HE WILL DIE AT SOME POINT. WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL THOUGH, IS THE JOURNEY YOU ALL TAKE IN THE COMING MONTHS SO THAT HE CAN DIE KNOWING YOU ALL DID WHAT YOU COULD, TRYING TO MAKE HIM COMFORTABLE AND HAPPY.

I WISH YOU ALL THE VERY BEST, AND YOU HAVE MY HEARTFELT CONDOLENCES.


catzrme
I am so sorry. Try a cancer support group in your area.


Lollypop
Rating
Oh hunny, I am so sorry for you. I know from previous experience how hard it can be. The only advice I can give you is be with him as much as possible and support him as much as you can. It's not going to be easy.

What support are you getting? If you are not getting any support for all that is happening to your brother, I suggest you call a friend and have a cry. Crying is the best source of healing. I know from experience how I felt when my aunt died of lung cancer. I was at an all time low and I felt like ending it.

I suggest you also speak to a counsellor. Explain how you are feeling to him and ask if there is anything you can take to make you feel better.

I know how hard it can be especially at this time of the year. If it's to be his last Christmas, make it as happy and joyious as you can. Play his favourite music, have food and make him smile. And, I think it'll do you good as well.

If you need someone to talk to, e-mail me at [email protected]

You are not alone! God bless sweetheart.


teepot
Rating
I am so so sorry. I know how you feel. My step father has luekemia. I have just been told he has only hours to live. I am absolutley gutted.

Just spend every minute you can with them and make the most of whatever time you can.

Thinking of you xxx


rhona b
Rating
my brother died of cancer 11 years ago now, you will never get over it but it will get easier to cope with through time.


Jude
That's really tough, especially at this time of year. You could try making this Christmas really special, depending on how much your brother can cope with.

Other than that, surround yourself with people who care about you and will let you talk, talk, talk, or just be quiet if that is what you need. Make sure you look after yourself, and don't take on anything that you feel you can't cope with.

Have a look at this website, it may help:

http://www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk/


mojorainbow1
Rating
Sorry to hear your news........

Can I suggest you make this the best, warmest and happiest Christmas he has ever known - both for him and you and the rest of your family. Think of things you can do as a family (that wont tire him out), get him to help making decorations, cookies etc - hopefully he'll enjoy being helpful rather than feeling as if he's a burden (even though he's not).

Doing things together will give you all memories to take on with you.

Good luck to you all............

Mojo
x


Lou
Rating
I'm so sorry to hear that you are going through such a rough time, no-one ever really gets over something like this you just get on with things until it doesn't hurt as much. My grandpa died of cancer 13 years ago i still find it hard to believe he's not round.

I think it is because he had to suffer when he was the nicest person i know, it just seemed so unfair. You've just got to be there for him when he needs you. Know that you have your other family members to talk to, you don't have to go through this alone, so don't, let someone know how you are feeling.

Make the last few months very special for everyone, make some brilliant memories and God bless x


Sarah
Rating
How terrible, try and keep your chin up and be strong for him
There are lots of people you can talk to to help


india
Rating
iam really sorry, take no notice of the other person who sent you that heartless message.
i know its so very hard for you but none of us cope we just get through it. our aunts the same.
my thoughts are with you
god bless you xx xx


tsulit
Rating
SWEETY, its hard to cope because you love him. Represent him well when his pain is taken from him. Take Care


English Knight
Rating
I'm really sorry to hear you are going through such a difficult time, sometimes talking and just having a listening ear will help enormously. If you go to BACUP http://www.cancerbackup.org.uk/Home you will be able to get the help line phone number (free phone) you will have access to specialist councellors with regard to cancer including helping young people through their difficult time. Dont worry if all you can do is cry, be silent, be angry or just wonder why this is all happening and why it maybe all unfair, the councellor will listen in a supportive way without judging you and may also be able to give you some tips on how to cope with such an enormous and sad event in your life. Thinking of you
Steve


♪ pepperkittyn ♪
First, I'm sorry. I have a friend who is going through the very same thing that you are, and I know how difficult it has been for her. Understand, though, that there is nothing that you can do at this point but pray. Pray for peace, for understanding, and for healing if you have enough faith.

I know that you're devastated, but take a look at your brother. Do you think that he's really happy right now? Cancer is very painful, especially when it is terminal.

Try to spend as much time with him as possible, and don't leave anything left unsaid. Make sure he knows that you love him, and do your best to make him stay in a happy mood.

Once again, I'm sorry for what you're going through. I could only imagine how difficult it is.


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