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Health Forum    Cancer
Health Discussion Forum

 Females only, please (pretty darn embarrassing)?
In my typical paranoid fashion, I've been doing a few checks of my -chest area- every couple weeks. I've noticed a solid area in both breasts, and since I'm getting pretty concerned, I&...


 Can you die from prostate cancer?
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 If smoking is bad for our health, then why don't they just stop making cigarettes?

Additional Details
I would't dare stop you from smoking to death; that is your choice. I won't even try to convince all the ...


 I've found a lump in my breast...?
It's just n the middle of my cleavage,and it hurts when you put pressure on it. could it be cancer? I'm 20 years old, but theres no history of it in my family.

Thanks....


 Help me i think i'm dying.?
ok so starting about a year ago i strated getting headaches all the time it stoppd for about 6 months and then it started agaian but along with the headaches i got extremely dizzy, i started to have ...


 My brother has cancer only 2 months left im finding it hard to cope?
im just devastated
Additional Details
thanks olivia its ...


 I am dying of of cancer, but i can't tell my fiance or family. I don't want them to fuss over me. I am scared
...


 Is it ok to smoke at age 14?
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 Should cell phones be banned from classrooms?
I think yes. There is no need for them to be taken to class. They can remain in lockers and be taken out on spares and lunch. If there is an emergancy, they can contact the school. Parents have ...


 Do you think we will ever be able to FIND A CURE TO CANCER?
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 Have you noticed that a few hours prior to death, the patient will suddenly experience an improvement?
and then, after about 12-24 hours deceases?
What could be the cause?

I have witnessed this in neonates, adults, and even animals.
Additional Details
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 My Dad has cancer? I have problems?
I found out my dad has cancer last week and he started chemo.
And I don't feel bad, as a matter of fact I don't feel any feelings?
What is wrong with me?...


 What do you think about people who are smoking?
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 My best friend just died?
She died of cancer and I wasn't there for her because I moved away. I thought there would be time to go and see her again, and the next thing I heard she had died. I feel so guilty and I can'...


 What is your excuse for being poor?
I meet people online and in person who are poor and there seems to be no hope for them. They didn't go to school, got a lame job, then had more kids then they could afford to have. Then, they ...


 My co-worker has brain cancer how do I insure that I won't catch it???
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 Do u think that a person who takes 5 cigarettes per day is somker or not ?
i heared couple of days ago from friend that 5 cigarettes per day or less man has been taken,,, don't represent him as smoker.so anyone read that in reports ?? or has reliable ...


 Does Weed cause cancer?
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 How long do people with lung cancer live?
dad been diagnosed with lung cancer starting chemo and radio therapy 5 day treatment. on morphine 5ml 4 times a ...


 Can i die of cancer if i don't smoke?
...



donella_lawson2003
I lost the love of my life ,to cancer about 1 month ago,could anyone tell me when the hurt stops?
                     




lovely lady
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It doesn't but as time goes on you just learn to cope with it. I am truely sorry for your loss.


LOLO
never my sister in law died two years ago from cancer and it still hurts. and just reading your question made me upset any time i hear the word it upsets me. and my other sister in law has battled with it. these are sister in laws and i have a feeling this person was more to you honey it will always be there just try to remember all the good times it is so hard but keep trying if it gets to hard talk to some one good luck and remember that person may be gone but the memories last a life time


top momma
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I am so sorry for your loss. I can't even begin to think of what that feels like. I don't know what to compare that to but I have lost and the only thing that helps lessen the pain is time. I know that isn't what you want to hear but that's it. I know you want to hear something that will work fast and take it away now,but just think about all the time and effort that you have in putting in to getting to know your love.
It will never go away but it will lessen.
May peace be with you!


neona807
Big hugs to you!

You know that your lover is still with you. The personality, the love, all the emotions that were him in life are still him. He has only left his physical body, his soul or whatever you want to call it that made him unique and special, is still alive, still loving and caring about you.
Yes you miss him, you miss not being able to see him, to talk to him, to just have him here with you. But he is still around, still loving you. You have to believe that. Its okay to feel sad and miss him but you should also be open to letting him make his presence known to you.

He will make himself known to you in dreams or in small subtle ways that are not scary, he wants you to be comforted. Look for little signs, a bird that sits outside your window just chirping and looking at you, a butterfly that gets close but just out of reach and seems to be paying attention to you, coins found in odd locations, the sounds of something that would remind you of him, the scent of his cologne or something else that reminds you immediately of him.

When you see any of these things, don't be quick to write them off as being something in the natural. These are little things he is doing to let you know that he is there and he still loves and cares about you.

You will probably always miss him but if you can open your mind up to the little things that he can do to let you know that he's around, you may find comfort in that.

If you want to discuss this further feel free to email me.


Stuart
It doesn't.

Some days, the hurt won't be as bad. Some days, it'll be worse.

Losing a loved one is very hard to bear. Find a support group so that you can lean when you need support, and you can be there when someone else needs a shoulder.

Good luck. - Stuart


Bandnerd
I am so sorry, it might not ever go away completely. As time goes by it want hurt as bad. I will pray for you.


hatingmsn
I dont think that the hurt ever stops but you can try to get on with life. Remember the good times dont dwell on the bad times.


orion_1812
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The hurt never stops. So keep the happy memory alive, in your mind, your heart in what you do.

I lost my Father when he was 26 and I was 7 months old. My mother was 18. I never knew him, just knew of him. This was in 1954. My cousin from his side of the family sent me a video cd that had old family movies, and I saw a 5 second clip of my father "moving" as opposed to still pictures. (which I have seen a lot of). My mom and I place flowers on his grave every Memorial Day. No the hurt doesnt go away, but keeping the memory alive makes it bearable.


mushthissel
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It never will. But as time goes by it will not hurt so bad.
Good luck.


bubblegum_express
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Not for a while, but the intense pain will eventually subside.

Good luck and take one day at a time.


fenx
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My sympathies to you and your family. The hurt will never stop. It will be like a scab that opens now and then to remind you it is with you for life. Some say time will heal, but it only dampens the pain.
Good luck.


butterflyfrills
the hurting never stops but its get better when you look up at the stars and see one that shines bright like a smile, that smile will be for you and it will help you with the pain. my best friend hung him self i never got over it its been over twenty years.


anjie3539759
it won't go away, but as time passes it will ease ..then you'll once again smile when you think of your loved one


See ya later aligator
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remember that person is in a better place now, and that person will live in your heart forever. You will always have memories, although the hurting will never stop, we just have to realize these things and move on, one chapter of your life is closed, and a new was is being written or born. You cant dwell on the past, just know that that person is with you whereever you go. Its only natural to hurt, even for a long time, but you still must move on no matter what.


KimB
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i lost my grandmother to cancer 7 yrs ag next month & it will always hurt but as time goes on you will heal. you will always remember them in your heart but know that they would want you to be happy. you have to beleieve that they are in a better place & know that when the time is right you two will be together again.


personnosrep
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dont know i lost some 1 to that an its been amost 6 years now im still sad still have the nightmares maybe someday


Gabriel M
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it will not stop.. but eventually you will learn to live with it..


buzzbait0u812
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That's a hard question! You know, it depends on the individual and what you do to make it go away. You have to go through certain phases. I think at first its shock because even though you knew it would happen its just shocking. Then you get angry. Then you get numb and that's when you get dangerous. Some people start using drugs or alcohol. Hopefully, you won't do this. You just have to remember the happy times you had with this person but try to put them somewhere safe in the back of your mind and try to go on with your life. Turn to your friends or if you are a religious person, ask God for help. It's hard to go through something like this alone. Remember we have the right to choose! We can choose to be happy or we can choose to be sad. Sometimes we have to force ourselves to be happy but once you fake it for awhile, eventually you really are happy again. You never forget the love of your life but you manage to go on and enjoy life as your lover would have wanted you to. Good luck to you. I'll be thinking of you in prayer.


daknzach
I don't think it ever goes away. Just gets less painful as time goes by.


snowwhite22003
You have to grieve for the person you love and thats normal and it takes people different times. I lost someone I loved and it took a long time, at first I was numb, then I kept expecting to see that person, something would remind me of them. Finally I cried and cried and cried. It was hard to believe and harder to accept. But in the end I took out the photo and now I can remember the good things and the good times with them. By doing that I am honoring that person in my heart. Now I feel a little sad sometimes, but my good memories are a comfort as it will be to you someday. But the only way through it, is through it. Good Luck and Peace


mamawdebbie45
my prayers are with you i have never lost any one to cancer my mom had breast cancer surgery 2 years ago she is doing fine they say the pain gets easier as time goes by i hope for you it does they were lucky to have you in their life


montanasamra
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The intense pain should stop once the immediate grieving period has ended. This time varies for people. After that, you will hurt, probably forever, but it should be only mild. It's ok to hurt, just make sure you're not going through this alone and always have conversations with other people if you ever need to get thoughts or feelings out.


pat
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only you can tell..


Jules
i'm sorry to hear that... but as time goes by, your hurt will become less because time heals everything!


KnowhereMan
When God gives you a new one... It's right to grieve, but hopefully God will fill that void in your life after awhile.


orcaspirits
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The hurting will never go away. You have to learn to live your life as he/she would have wanted you to live. Just remember the good things, remember your love and the awesome feelings it brought to your life and then smile...


sizzlingl
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It will get easier or rather the deep pain will subside but when my aunt, father, uncle and 2 close friends died in a six month span I went to a support group and that did help. There are some out there that are good. You hear the stories about wo is me groups but call the cancer center in your city/town they will be able to help.
Find a good friend that will listen and be there for you.
God Bless


game on
It is so hard to tell when the hurt will stop. The love you had for your partner will never diminish. And let me send you my condolences. It is truly hard to deal with the loss of a loved one. All I can suggest is remeber the good times you had. Remeber the bad times too. They were the times you spent together. And remember that your partner is always with you and remembering the same times you are remembering. IT will get easier. The time is differant for everyone. I wish you the best. And again I am truly sorry for your loss.


miss hannah
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I can't tell you when the hurting will stop, only time can tell. It will take quite a long time, and I'm sure it's very hard for you right now even if it happened a month ago, and loosing someone is the hardest thing to ever recover. I'm sorry for the terrible tragedy, but you most likely need to move on and live life as it is. You can't sit home and dwell over this because your life isn't the end of it. Go out with friends, pick up a new hobby to keep your mind off of it and to keep your occupied. The only way it will help you get over it is by keeping yourself busy, not just sitting at home wondering about it. So get off the computer and go call up a friend and go to Starbucks or something! =).


sparkles
I'm so sorry for your loss. I can relate. And the hurt will never really go away. It just fades with time. You need to hear some insp;iring words (as I did). So here goes: my favorite quote, courtesy of Mother Theresa (I have this on my refrigerator). 'God never gives me more than I can handle. I just wish he didn't trust me so much'. There is one answer. God trusts you. Another thought: God didn't promise, when he put any of us on earth, that he would let us stay forever. Your special person was here, on God's schedule, and did what he was supposed to do. And God said 'o.k., you did great. Now it's time to come home'. And so special person was called home. When we're put here on earth, we're given free will. Sometimes I wish that was not true, but it is. God gives us free will. He doesn't make us sick. It happens. And sometimes there's a miracle, and the cancer, or whatever, goes away. Sometimes God doesn't feel that a miracle is what he wants. I guess the bottom line is this: your special person isn't really gone. He/she will live in your heart, and memory, forever. Keep in mind that your special person can see you. What would he/she want you to be doing? You have to keep living. It says something about the effect this person had on you. That you have strength. This love of your life wouldn't want you to be hurting. Instead of hurting, take the hurt and use it to give you strength, to help someone else who may be going through something similar. And the best advice of all is: talk to the 'Boss'. God is right there with you. To quote one of my affirmations that is on my bedroom wall: 'God doesn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, or sun without rain. God does promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and a light for the way. And for all who believe . . .and have faith, he answers that faith with everlasting love.' Have faith, you're not alone. You're never alone. Karen . . Angel in Training, 2nd Class


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