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Health Forum    Mental Health
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 I have a thing for my plumber.. should I lock him in the house with me?
Two weeks ago I had a clogged bathroom drain due to some old tampons. Anyway.. DAMN! the plumbers as sweet as apple pie.. a down right HUNK of a man!

So last week I clogged up my drains on ...


 is anyone going through what im going through please help?
my childs father in i was in a relationship for a year in a half we now have a 1 year old daughter in a baby on the way 5 month pregnant. were not together anymore now cause he left me 3 months ago ...


 Should I kill myself???????? I am 16?
I truly have nothing to live for, no good friends, lovers or family that cares about me. My dad is a douche (putting it extremely lightly) and my mom's a drug addict. I don't believe in god,...


 Are you addicted to anything?
Not necessarily anything immediately dangerous like drugs or alcohol. More harmless things like facebook, a TV show, a particular food, etc....


 self esteem problem.....?
ok so, something has been going wrong with my self esteem. like b4, i was a reallllly happy person. i loved to go out with my friends and just be around people. and i was kinda full of my self, i ...


 Im 15 and suicide is what I think about.?
I am a 15 year old girl and I feel that my life is bad enough for it to end it's not really something I should being posting on here but I need advice ad I have no one who I can talk to about ...


 Why do crazies some times sleep in bathtubs?
Every time i see a movie about a crazy person chances are he will sleep in a bath tub, Why is that?...


 i think i have ocd tell me?
When i wash my hands i sometimes do it more than once. When i walk, sometimes i go back a few steps and do it again. I think i even sometimes turn lights on and off more than once. Now tell me ...


 Why am I listening to classical music?
I like it, but for about the past two weeks, I've had a particular spike in interest. I don't know what it is, am I depressed?? I have been listening to Air on G, Requiem-Mozart, Clair de L...


 do i need some pot to calm my nerves?
im always paranoid, anxious and over anylize every little ache or pain or everything else to life. i cant sleep and nite and i sure as hell cant relax! just curious wud this drug help me at all?...


 I've been really depressed lately and nothing seems to help!!!!?
ive been real depressed lately and been feeling really lonley, i feel like im sketchin around the brim of sanity. ive tryed every thing that makes me feel good (no drugs or booze) evrey thing i love ...


 am i weird or its me (huh i cant understand why but i cant kill myself)?
huh i cant understand why but i cant kill myself

i tryed to cut my arms
i tryed to eat medics and i ated lots of them
i trewed myself in front of a car the car stopped
hang ...


 I truely need help, I'm feeling so suicidal?
My mind is really messed up at the moment,Im so depressed, I feel like there is no point in me living another day,Im 19 n have been feeling this way for a very long time now - previously on here ...


 i have Suicidal thoughts.. help me please!?
i'm really depressed.... i am a 16 year old Boy ,i've never had a girlfriend,i've never even hugged or held hands with a girl that isn't related to me.... i'm not good at ...


 I am having an emotional problem over something bad I did?
The other day a question and an answer here on Yahoo Answers was in violation and they deleted them as they should. Now I feel so dirty and horrible for violating Yahoo. They trusted me to ask and ...


 What is the best way to break a lifestyle habit?
I'm looking for answers of substance. What psychological tricks can I pull to make myself go out during the weekends, rather than just staying inside, playing video games and smoking pot?...


 Help Me With Myself!!!?
i am 16 years old , my parents are pretty wealthy and i pretty much have every thing i could possibly want and more (bmw, dirtbikes, etc). even with all this, somehow i feel lost within myself. my ...


 I use yahoo answers when I'm lonely, does any one else ?
I suffer from depression and because of this I basically have no friends. I ask questions on Yahoo Answers because I'm lonely . It excites me when I get a new answer. Does anyone else feel this ...


 thoughts of suicide, i want to die but, i also want to live?
i want to know how to want to live when i feel as though my world is crashing down around me.

i have made a list of everything that i want to do b4 i die but, everytime i look review it, ...


 Suicidal, have asked for help and nothings happened?
I don't know what to do anymore.

I have told my GP and Key worker how I am feeling. My psychiatrist says theres nothing else can be done. I have rang the samaritans and the crisis ...



∫e mousquetaire XVI
if youve had a tough, hard life and you feel its turned you into a serious intense person, how do you undo all
the damage that youve suffered in your life, and rediscover that childlike, youthfull carefree mentality?
im 30 years old now have borderline pd have endured alot of pain, trauma and hardship since 15..and im waiting for some kind of therapy. but i just feel permenant damage has been done by other people throughout my life, and ive been changed forever as a person.
some helpline woman said you cant change whats happened and itll be apart of you forever. this got me thinking
                      








Totem
While, yes, it does become a part of who you are... there is hope.

You cannot undo it all and you cannot take away the bad memories. What you can do, however, is take back your life... take back your power, seek out happiness.

Dabble into different beliefs, look into other ways of thinking... other sciences. What makes you truly happy? I mean truly happy... surely there's something that makes you smile.. makes you laugh?

Truly know your likes and dislikes... Surround yourself with caring personalities, truthful/honest people, supportive people.

For me, I found my peace through Astrology,reincarnation,spirituality. I then let loose. I'm no longer the uptight, self-righteous b**ch I was years ago. I finally feel free. (I wanted to listen to my favorite bands in high school... AC/DC; Guns N Roses, Warrant, Poison, Aerosmith, etc.. but couldn't <not allowed in our house> and I had to portray a *perfect christian.) I never really listened to them until recently (part of my letting loose) and I'm no longer taking life so seriously.

What I'm trying to say is seek out and find what interests you... look to find peace and become empowered. It will do you a world of good.

:)


siopaO
Rating
i dont think i can.... but instead all i can do is to accept....


Traci G
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I have Borderline, also. It might feel like you cannot recover; but there is hope. People do recover. There is a type of therapy called Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) by Dr. Linehan. You might be able to buy her book. The therapy is listed on the webpage for the National Institute for Mental Health as a solution to Borderline.


�¤p�dѡ
Rating
Ctrl+Z --> UNDO
:D


Mandi M
try taking up a hobby. a healthy hobby


question mark
I could chronologacly be your grandfather, waded through h**L and sometimes fanned the flames. I am an now a very reclusive old man.I don,t feel so mutch dammaged as I feel I have changed from what I could have ben into something I would not have chozen to be but my life has definately not ben a total loss. Old age has one merrit and that is it always gives prespective.


:p
the helpline lady is right in that you can't turn back the clock. BUT here are some questions to you,

1 can you make, and stick to plan to change your lifestyle now?
2 can you effectively (on your own or through medication) control your behaviour.?-- (not your moods no-one can really do that). but can you keep yourself from blowing up at inopportune times?
3 can you talk to people on a casual basis and make new friends.

these are the only tools you really need to change the way you live as far as I have found. There isnt much in your question about what you want to change but you are young and you have another whole lifetime ahead of you to learn and acheive some goals. Keep them realistic dont aim too low or too high.

my partner suffers from bipolar and borderline pd so I have seen a lot of the effects. You MUST try to find the good in everything as sickening as that may sound. The bad things in life will show themselves without your help.

The good things often need to be dug out of the wreckage. if you dont look for them you may never find them. consider it like mining for gold or diamonds.

You know the drill by now. before you enter a situation that you may be apprehensive about, make sure that you cover the bases.

Be truthfull in all your dealings because its just easier that way. you don't have to waste time thinking "what if they find you out to be a fraud".

Don't put people in a position where you need to trust them either. nobody really wants to be put on the hook for your trust except people who might want to abuse it. keep strangers at arms length until they have proven they are decent but still dont trust them with anything important.

If someone asks for a couple of bucks or something small and you want to do it because you'd like to be friends them, then consider it a gift rather than a loan until its paid. Just say "dont worry about it you'd do the same for me". I have found nothing that gets it back faster or makes better friends. the ones who dont want your friendship generally wont accept your "charity".

In financial dealings always do the math ahead of time.
Educate yourself before entering into new situations and be open about the fact that you know what to expect and therefore deny them the opportunity to cheat you.

Do things by the book and don't accept "special favours" that you will be asked to return in some unknown way later.

Live as much as you can by the "golden rule" (sorry if you arent Christian... I'm not preaching here)

Do to others the kinds of things that
you WOULD LIKE others to do to you.

It really is an extremely satisfying way to deal with other people. It is also fairly non denominational and won't conflict with any religious beleifs except maybe SATANISM.

It doesnt even matter if they reciprocate because it is all about how it makes you feel. Theres just no pleasing some people and you can't let that fact get you down

in short prepare for the worst, and then hope for the best.


2 cents
this is a very good question...true you can't change the past...but don't allow it to control your future. Counseling and therapy help but it takes a long time. Good people will come into your life and help ease the bad memories. Those bad memories will never fully go away...but they will soften in time and become less intense. Do things that will make you happy. There are millions like you out here....smile at strangers...spread the happiness.


la varonesa
Hi, thats true you can't change whats happened to you. But you can make the "Best" of it. change the negative to positive. First tell your heart, I'm going to forgive the people who damaged me, because I don't want "hate" growing inside me, because it's going to affect my spirit (Jesus said to God - forgive them father because they don't know what their doing), and even when they hurt him so severe, he always kept his love for us.
All your trauma in the past, has made you today a stronger and more experienced person. the positive of that is that it's easier now to understand when someone wants to harm you, and you will tolerate what others can't. Life is hard but its up to us to make it better. One thing helped me. I read the New Testament of the bible, to learn from Jesus. I pray in Jesus name, and I let him in my heart, he is my Savior, since then I've been able to forgive, and forget heartache because he feels me of joy and love. Remember you are "Special" and someone really LOVES YOU, from who you are, Jesus. and he is waiting for you. Don't let your mind tell you you won't be able to do or be nothing, tell your mind and your spirit that you are somebody and you going to be the best of it . Jesus will help you . Without him its very difficult. Let him in your heart. Bye.


Coop 366
Which is true, you can not change what has happened to you in the past but you can change the future you. Life loves to kick you in your teeth, only how you use that will make you a better or worse person. You can not go back to your youth but only choose to remember the good can help.


KImmz
i don't agree with the hotline person. everyone has the right to be who they want to be and i think that you are seriously capable of changing yourself and undoing all these damages.. firstly you have to forget the past... now then try to look for new things in life that interest you, find something that you're good at . just try to calm yourself down.. get some fresh air or something. your life will certainly get better =)


Mapple
Rating
Yoga.....meditation ....and breathing exersize....early morning....at dawn........will unwind you .....right from day one.....Follow and persue your passion.....put ..a picture of sea.....blue....sea....


aqua aries
Rating
I am totally in a situation right now where myself and my husband have become very cold-hearted due to what we have done to eachother. I would only suggest that only YOU can make you happy! I feel depressed sometimes, but I do not rely on anyone other than myself to pick myself up and go because there are good things in our lives...not all is bad. There is always something to look forward to. Find a hobby to do alone for quiet time (i do puzzles) or go to those adult group activities such as dancing, bowling, etc.
I am also 31. I think you will be fine, just keep your head up!


pleasewaterme
Rating
Having a tough hard life is nothing new and not unusual so you're not alone. Imagine being on one of those chain gangs and being a slave 2000 years ago when the had no antibiotics for toothaches and such like you see in those sandle epics. Or even today . What famous people have had tough,hard lives and yet been successfull and fullfilled. I've had my heart broken and every time I think about it it takes all my energy but it passes.


RU4REAL?
Move to "Candyland..."

...or become a "Ward of the State..."

or...

"Welcome to the World, Oh, Blameful One..."

The "sheety" world your find yourself in...

Is of "YOUR OWN" making...

"I" am NOT the one who "F***ed" your Mom...!!!)

Lighten up...(and yank yourself out of that "self-pity party pool" that you've immersed yourself in...)

You've been in "human chlorine" for too long now, and it's time to "dry" off...

You're turning into a "prune..."

(what "other" people "did" to you in your past...

is "irrelevant...")

"What are YOU going to do "NOW...?!?"

"And what have you done, lately...?!?"

Again...Welcome to the World, my child...

Welcome...


COOKIE
Listen to me you sound like a very bright person .i have had a very very tough life i have lost my dad he died in my arms i tooked care of him he was my hero when he died he weighed 70lbs my brother my only sibling went to bed and never woke up....my mother had a nervous because he was her baby boy 1 week later my mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer I was alone I took care of all the arrangements I met my hubby in med school we married and 6 months later he was killed by a drunk driver and i was 3 months pregnant with twins..I have survived and so can you we face life and we take what life gives us we grow stronger never thinking that we will but my friend you will i have faith in you and i will pray for you .please if you seek help I would see a psychiatrist this is a medical trained to help you ....we can't change the past but we heal and you will you are strong kara


waterlily
Well, actually you've survived it all haven't you? That says something right there! Yes, our past is important however our future is our choice too. You can look at the past as what not to do, use it as a learning experience, make it something useful instead of something bad.

Everyone has had bad stuff happen and dysfunctional families...it's just part of life. You are not unique with this. Try not to let it become a way of defining you, you define yourself!


toadoflossers
For Christ's sake man, STOP LIVING IN THE PAST. It's all gone, all over, done with, no more, finished, ended, etc. etc. Try looking at the future for a change instead of keeping on about the past - it's OBVIOUSLY doing you no good whatsoever keeping on about it all the time, so why don't you step out of your time warp and realise that we're now more than halfway through 2007, not still in the 'eighties or 'nineties when you reckon you had all the bad times.
When you go out "about your business" EXPECT to find people looking at you - THAT'S WHAT PEOPLE DO - they look around them and at other people to see if they know them. Most of them would even offer help if you look in distress and would help anyway if you had an accident or were taken ill unexpectedly. If you overhear them chatting with each other or on their mobiles, EXPECT THAT TO HAPPEN - People DO talk to each other and don't kid yourself that they're talking about YOU - they've all got far better things to worry about than talk about you, so don't draw silly conclusions because you overhear something which in the first place was never meant for your ears anyway. Don't go round expecting the worst from everybody - they've got their own problems, some of them quite big ones, so if they look a bit grumpy when they glance in your direction, they're more than likely in a world of their own and the fact that they're looking in your direction probably doesn't even register with them, let alone cause them to automatically put you into the "Ohmigord, he's a villain" box - so stop being a miserable git. Walk about proudly, take that frown off your forehead and put a bit of a smile on your face - I don't mean go round laughing at people, but just don't look so despondent all the time !
Now go out there, and with all the answers you've had from over a thousand questions (most of them the same but worded differently just so they don't look as though they are the same WHICH THEY ARE usually - most of US could write you life story for you if ever you wanted a bio done!) put the good ones to use and start living your life instead of telling us how bad it's been IN THE PAST. Today starts the future - MAKE IT WORK FOR YOU so that people don't look at your questions and think to themselves "Oh Jeez - it's him again!"


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