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Health Forum    Mental Health
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 Would spending time in a mental home ruin your life?
What I mean is would it affect you getting a job or making friends if everyone knew? eg wouldn't it make perfect gossip for people to spread round and add things to?

Reason I'm ...


 Mom's computer addiction?
My mom is 53 years old and has a major computer addiction. She sits on the computer all day, and doesnt get up unless she is going somewhere or going outside to smoke. She plays spades online the ...


 is sucide a way out or is it a choice to end pain?
well 31 years old alone dying (hiv) and so angry about it didnt tell anyone and lost my job from the anger dont you think sucude is the way to go or dye a long painful ...


 How do I tell my mom that I am depressed?
I mean I don't know how to tell her I can't take it no more. I am hurting my family and everyone around me because of this thing. And I don't want to end up killing myself. This has ...


 Why do people say self-harm is bad?
Ok, so, I hear all the time, don't cut yourself because it's bad...blah, blah, blah. But I don't see why it's all that bad. I do it, for one, for a number of different reasons, ...


 Is schizophrenia related to ghosts at all?
Do you think that schizophrenia has anything to do with ghosts? Like do people who have it see ghosts?...


 I'm depressed?
Help? Kind Words?...


 I don't really know what these attacks are.?
I get these all the time and they last for about 30 minutes.
I:'
sweat
hear voices
shake uncontrolably
i see faces trying to get me
i lose control of my body
...


 I'm having a really bad day; can anyone help me to feel better by telling a joke or giving inspiration?
...


 Does anyone get this?
Now and again, when I'm sleeping I'll wake up conscious but my eyes are closed and i can't move my body which I'm aware of, i then panic at the fact i can't move my body so i ...


 What is the meaning of life?
I'm fully aware that the existence and frequency of this question is already extensive here. I'm a Muslim, and my religion states that we are put on this Earth to worship God and do good ...


 im SO OBSESSED WITH MY UGLY FACE ?!?
IM SOOO UGLY I CANT STAND ME INFRONT OF THE MIRROR I WISH I WAS PRETTIER ......................MY NOSE HAS A BUMP (A NASAL BUMP) AND IT LOOKS DISCUSTING ...................WHEN PEOPLE SEE ME THEY SE...


 what's the difference between ADD and ADHD?
...


 I'm under a lot of stress today. How can I relax tonight.?
This has been a busy week here at our state house. I'm supposed to board a train tonight to visit a friend in the City. I'm so stressed and anxious that I'm having trouble relaxing. I ...


 i'm just going to come right out with it. should i seek professional help?
i have been suffering depression for several years now. i have my good days... like when my sons were born... but for the most part i am almost always in a funk. i try to joke about serious things, ...


 I Cant sleep! What should I do?
this is the 3rd night in a row and I have to work in the morning. I've tried a glass of wine, a Benadryl, a natural supplement, everything I usually do these past 3 nights and I can't sleep ...


 I heard my mom prayers and ?
It was something that I dont understand at all, she kept saying god please make my husband bigger to save our marriage, I dont wana cheat.. god please consider this serious...
What the hell i ...


 Bored....dont knwo what to do?!?
I have no idea what to do...im bored out of my mind..any ideas?...


 Why I shouldn't drink alcohol when I am depressed?
...


 How to calm an panic attack?
Been dealing with panic attacks again (especially with all the bad weather lately)

What are some good ways to get my anxiety in check. (I try to not to use medicine for it. Infact I don&...



Faт℮.♥.
How can I learn to take critisism better?
When someone critisizes (I'm not sure if that's spelled right) I take it personally. I don't ever show I do, I won't get angry or anything, but after someone says something I try to change it and it somehow gets me depressed. I'm not sure how to explain it. For example, my friends can say that I'm being annoying or something and I take it personally and think they mean I'm annoying all the time so I stop doing things that might bother them which I think might be everything so I just stay out of the way? So how can I brush off what people say easier, so it doesn't affect me so much?
                      








☮, ♥, ☉☉, & ☺
You spelled it wrong, it's criticism. Why can't you get anything right?


macy
Rating
you can just ignore it.


Easter Bunny
Rating
I know what you mean, I usually let my anger spark at them, and insult them to where there crying. However, this tatic isnt the best. I usually just ignore it, as if they hadnt said anything, or compliment them back. But do not insult them back


klm95
Rating
i think that if they call u annoying then u should just try to calm down a little thats what i do and then my friends stop yelling at me.


big kahuna
yeah you take it too personally, alot of times friends do it like a joke, a figure of speach, just let it go in one ear and out the other, or laugh about it


ton d
Rating
Well you can start by not taking things so personally! Just kidddng. It would help if you try adopting the "I don't give a F." philosophy. I used to let stuff really get to me too, but one day i realized it doesn't matter what people think because it's not going to change unless I want it too anyway. And furthermore, most of them have way more things I'd like to criticize about them. It helps if you love yourself alot too. Not in a self-centered way, just a healthy state of being way.


penis
well iv exepted im a d*ck i just get on with it if people say something i ignore them if they dont like it its their problem not urz


Tamara♥
I've been getting bad comments on everything I do for a long time (ever since taekwondo) what youneed to do is listen for what they are suggesting not how they say it.... like try to work off of the suggestions you get not be torn down by the bad comments that were made


ChrisP
That's a toughie! What helps me is to realize two things: 1) sometimes other people can see me more clearly than I can and 2) that other people can be wrong.

My first response to criticism is to look at what they said and ask myself if, from their perspective, they might be right. Have I said something that can be taken the wrong way? Do I interrupt? Do I always want things my own way? I judge myself by my intentions, while the world judges me by my actions because they can't see my intentions.

If I can look at myself and honestly say that I've done nothing wrong, then I conclude that they are wrong. Other people have bad days and sometimes say things they don't mean, or sometimes they don't know the whole story.

Criticism hurts, there's no getting around that, but I am learning how to react more positively to it. Good luck!


Shoog
The world is full of people and you need to stop carring what they say in exaggeration. Start standing up! Tell them they're more annoying!!


fleur79
Some friends! - they call you 'annoying'?

Criticism is hard to take on any level because it IS personal. If you change your behaviour every time someone calls you 'annoying' or whatever your fake friends call you...you will find yourself being a mold of whatever they want you to be. Walking on eggshells afraid of the next criticism is not a nice way to live.

Best advice - be yourself, don't be afraid to do whatever it is that you're doing....if people don't like it, and call you annoying or say you're bothering them - do yourself a favour and get some new friends & people that like you for you and don't hurt your feelings like that all the time.

It's normal to feel the way you do - it's not normal for friends to treat others the way they've treated you. I find when a member of a group of friends succeeds in any way, the rest of them will try to make them feel bad - kind of like a 'bucket of crabs' - when one tries to get out of the bucket the rest pull it down back inside.


Indego
I got two answers for you. I use them both. (I AM a critic, not by choice, but because people ask me about their art, and I tell the truth....)

it can either come with time. (it will anyways)

Back mouth them. Nothing makes it go away better than a good comeback.(being able come after a year or two of hearing something and thinking of ways you can turn it around.)


concerned neighbor
Remember a criticism is just someone else's opinion. Try to think to yourself, okay, they're entitled to their opinion, but I don't have to change because of it.

For example, if you told a friend you didn't like their new hairstyle, you wouldn't expect them to rush off and change it, just because of your comment.

If you're not sure why someone makes a certain comment ask them. If they say you're annoying, ask them what it is that's so annoying. If you think it's something you might benefit from if you changed, then work on it. Otherwise just shrug these things off. Sounds like just typical young girl behavior to me. So, stop worrying.


Tiffany
Rating
I understand where you are coming from. I tend to do the same thing. I take every thing someone says to me way to personally. I keep a journal and I write all my feelings down in it, I know it sounds childish, but it help releive the stress. I just try and not focus too much of mu attention on the bad things they said and more on the good. I leave myself little notes lying all around in random places, saying things such as "Think POSITIVE Thoughts" "You are Beautiful" "You Can Do It" Positive re-enforcement helps alot. Good luck to ya! Iknow that you can get through it!


♥ LIFE!!!
Rating
That comes along with self confidence. You need to coach yourself in believing that you are beautiful, and that you are a good person. You can't control what other people say to you, but if you believe without a doubt, that you are a cool person and someone worth knowing, then the things that people say to you really won't matter.


People put others down, because they have yet to coach themselves into being self confident, so they put others down to give them that temporary boost.

You may also want to consider finding a new group of friends. Judging from your question you seem like you are a teenager, and let me tell you... those years are tough, and women can be very catty. The friends you have now will come and go, TRUST ME!!!

Also remember when all else fails, don't forget to smile =)


N227
Rating
Well I am kind of like that for example like if someone says something negative about my appearance I go crazy. For example my co worker said well I notice you have acne you should use proactive and I went to the mirror a few more times and paid closer attention to those little spots on my face but then I got over it. It's important to be able to take constructive criticism but if someone is just downing you then that's very different but if they are trying to bring you up so that they can help you then take it with a grain of salt. Look inside yourself and try and change.


Kakekomi
Rating
No one likes to hear that they were wrong or they weren't doing somethings suffitiently. All you can do is keep a positive attitude about it. I know what you mean though, you just want to give up completley, call it quits for good.
Brush it off.


melissamarie_82
Stop worrying about what people think of you. You are your own person and if they don't like it then thats their problem. Believe in yourself. Take a step back and look at them....who are they to criticize??


John M
Just ignore them. They probably are not worth your time.


Trying to have fun forever!
Rating
just ignore it and keep on being yourself! and if your friends keep on criticising (i dont if its spelled right) then they really arent your friends..


private
An answer to your important question.
Please call with any problem, anytime:
Girls and Boys Town "National Hotline"
Phone: 1-800-448-3000 (toll free)
Email: [email protected]


jennifer f
Rating
just think if your really doing what they are criticizing about if you are try doing it another way and if not dont listen to them because nobody is perfect to criticize anybody


When I was a teen, my friends would always give me a jab, say something hurtful, and when I got mad ( though I wouldnt show anger I would show hurt) They would say "oh your just too sensitive". My mom always said they were jelous of me and this was there way of getting back at me. Took me years to look back on the situation and realize that WAs what they were doing to me.


Open-Mind
Rebbecca,

The simple fact that you ask such a meaningful question means that you are a person of great quality striving for self-improvement. Not many people can lay claim to the same thing and I can say LOUD AND CLEAR THAT THIS MAKES YOU SOMEONE WORTH KNOWING.

You should not however, bend over backwards to make every one happy as you'll never succeed , there will always be someone who won't like the way you are or behave.

What I would recommend is to apply the principle of fairness and justice to the things you say or do. No one will be able to uphold their grievances against you if you are fair or just. If in your actions you ask yourself if you are being fair and just then you won't go wrong. You'll find that at times people will dislike your choices but will never be able to maintain grudges or hold it against you publicly and that's already much more than good enough. And if at times you are a bit selfish in your action then so be it, no one's perfect anyway....

I commend you for asking such a positive question, it's a bowl of fresh air...

ADDITION:
One of the ways you can find out if people are pointing things out in order to help you is to ask them to be specific. If someone says you're being annoying ask if they referr to something you said or to your attitude or anything else. And before you take any action just say you'll think about and then go and check with others to see if they to find that action annoying as well and why. By trying to find the root of people's attitude or reaction to the way you behave you can establish if there's any foundation to it and so if you need to make any changes...
Also remember to tell them that you would rather they took you aside and told you personally about the behaviour that annoyed them as you are sensitive to public criticism. If they refuse to point it out to you discretely then you should discontinue listening to them as people who don't factor in your personal sensitivities don't really care about you anyway...


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