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Health Forum    Cancer
Health Discussion Forum

 Billions & billions of dollars have been raised for cancer research, but no cure. Do you think they really...
don't want to find a cure because pharmacuetical companies, hospitals and doctors make so much money off of the disease?...


 what is your opinion on the cause of the somewhat recent cancer outbreak?
my personal opinion is that geneticaly engineered foods have alot to do with it because ever since there debut in the 90's autism and cancer have skyrocketed to the point where 1 in 8 women will ...


 will my hair fall out? ?
i've got a benign brain tumour. i may need to have radiation. what is this? will my hair fall out? will i need support? i live alone and dont hav anything to do with my family and cant count on ...


 where can i talk 2 people with cancer??
i was recently diagnosed with cancer and am currently going through chemo ..........my family and friends have been gr8 but it's hard to talk 2 them because they dont realy know what i'm ...


 Is it common among teenagers that smoke cigarettes to get lung cancer?
...


 why can't governments try to find some medicine which can help smokers quit their habit?
The antsmoking campain can best dealt with there could be drungs specfically to help peole quiting the habit and at the same time reduce the risks of cancer....


 is it advisable not to get involved with a girl who has had breast cancer before for health reasons?
curious? :D
Additional Details
hey i was just asking. why are you all getting so mean?...


 my husband has brain cancer told about 3 mos to live ,all bills are in his name, how do I change them to mine?
all bills are in his name, I want to change them into my name, before he dies?...


 Do all cancer patients lose hair?
Do people diagnosed with ANY cancer lose hair?...


 My husband is drinking himself to death, and does 'nt know what he's doing, do I tell him or let him slip away
He is content and happy in his damaging life style, have I the right to change all that, when there is no garuantee that he will want to stop. I'm not interested in Alanon. He has asthma, ...


 Why does my mom's death seem like a bad dream?
She died over a week ago and it's still sinking in, but I feel like someone's going to pinch me and I'll wake up.

I live about 300 miles away from my dad and sisters and I ...


 I just found out I have cancer?
I'm worried, confused, and I have already pushed some people I care about a great deal away...how do I begin to deal with all this?
Additional Details
I'd love to tell them I ...


 Im 22 and dying of throat cancer I think its probably my fault. Its to late to be treated what should I do?
Im saying its my fault because i started drinking and using tobacco when i was 16. I quit dipping 8 months ago but it was to late a month after i quit i kept getting a sore throat. I went to a couple ...


 what are the types of cancer?
...


 does weed cure cancer?
...


 When patients and family members say. "We want everything possible done."?
Risking some angry responses here. I heard this quite often as an oncologist - "We want everything done.". But these days there are so many more things that can be done and many ...


 It's believed that of all cancer deaths may be directly related to diet?
A.one-fifth
B.one-fourth
C.one-third
D.one-...


 what does it mean if you have blood on your stool?
...


 do you smoke?
how many of you said you were going to give up as your new years resolution have you give in already my mam says it every year but it never ...


 why has no one found a cure for cancer yet?
my best friend has got cancer! it's not fair!!!!!!!!...



James C
I just found out my older sister's cancer is gettig worse. I want to be with her but what's the best approach
We have always been pretty close even though there ia a 11 year age difference. I just lost another sister last February to an auto-immunne disease and she was only 55.
This sister recently recieved a report that the chemo was helping and then yesterday she got another report that it was worse than before. This really broke her spirit. I wnt to see her and be with her but don't want to make things worse because of her worrying about how I take it. She's like a second mother to me. She's been fighting this thing for a long time noe "about 12 years". We used to live 12 hours apart but now only about 3 by car. What can I do for her.
                      








Dorothy and Toto
You can share this with her. "The challenges we face either build character or reveal it." She is loved and not alone. Best of luck


davidwrightpat
Rating
I would love to give you the answer James.... but.... I cant...
Just be there for her, your sister will want to be alone... but explain... you want to share as much as possible, everything, being there is the best remedy anyone can ask and give, I have lost so much from my family and they are healthy......Be strong for your sister, it wont be easy, it isnt a test, just be the shoulder, the hand , the ear that is always there.... I am sorry for your pain but be strong for your sister...lol


kristizzles
Rating
i know how you feel. the love of my life has had cancer for 3 years now and i know its insainly hard to firgure out how your sopposed to help. you dont want to say or do the wrong thing and make them think about it. but honestly the absolute best thing to do is just to act normal around her. dont treat her like shes sick or that she cant do something JUST becuase she isnt 100% healthy. the reason why cancer patients feel so down is because they arnt treated like everyone else. act like nothings wrong, dont talk about anything related to her cancer unless he brings it up and wants to talk about it. thats when you should listen to what she has to say and support her. but if she doesnt want to talk about it then talk about normal everyday things that you've always talke dto her about. even before her cancer. i kno its hard to watch someone you love go through somthing so awful for such a long period of time but being there so they kno you care and not treating them differently makes all the differnce in the world. i promise.


Panda
Be with your sister every chance you can, but try to understand that she probably also wants you to continue living your life to the best of your ability. She does not want you to feel guilty about visiting or spending time with her.

My sister in law passed away from advanced breast cancer. She knew for 12 months that she would die and was in hospice care. Her four adult married children tried to spend every weekend or possible moment with her while maintaining homes and jobs. But this actually added to the stress level of my sister in law who always felt like she had to act like she was not sick when they were around. My brother finally had to ask them not to come around so often as it was making their Mom feel bad. Keep that in mind . . visit, by all means, send cards, flowers, little gifts . . but make sure that your visits are welcomed. She already knows that you love her. She knows how bad you feel. So, now just enjoy her as much as possible and do not look into the future. Enjoy the present.


Rosey
Go and be there for your sister. You can be of great help to her by listening to what the doctors say, reading to her and being there to listen. She may have things to say that you may not want to hear but just listen. Most of all, do not give up hope till she is gone because hope is what gets us through. Love her and understand her. Look after you to!


Bruce
you can suggest that she try EMU OIL GEL CAPS 3 times a day. emu oil kills cancer cells and is safe to take, one should always consult their doctor before trying anything new.


Country Girl
Rating
be there for her listen laugh and love her i feel for you its harder for you your the one who worries more than most cancer is awful but she may have years and years and years god bless you and her!! could u both take a hol???


Ryan
Rating
Go to her James and be like a "rock" for her!


superstar68
Rating
Your sister needs you more than ever at this moment of life. I too lost my mum to cancer 8 months ago and we were very close, she was my best friend apart from being my mum. If you can stay with her and chat about the past, when you both were little. Remember good things from the past. Show her that you love her and stay strong and positive. I never used to cry in front of my mum as she had enough worry with what she was going through but when I was not with her I cried all I wanted. Yours sister is in my prayers. God Luck and God Bless. If you ever need to talk do not hesitate to email me.


smee_1972
Rating
Oh James, I am so sorry for you and your family.

Really, the best thing you can do for your beloved Sister is to be there, and be yourself - the same loving little brother she knows so well. There really isn't anything 'different' that you need to do. Just be there.

You are, at least, living much nearer to her now. Try to see her as often as possible - tell her when you'll be coming over, and stick to it. You need to share time with her - for both your sakes.

If she's eating and has an appetite (I know that many cancer sufferers do not) then make or buy her favourite goodies, and take her yummy things to eat. Take her out for a drive, if she's up to it. Give her a foot massage.

Now, this is another idea which was the right thing to do when someone very, very close to me was suffering from cancer - it may not be the right thing for your Sister, but I shall suggest it anyway.....had you considered spiritual healing? Healers do not claim to be able to cure cancer - they cannot do so - but when my special person was suffering and could not leave her front room, she would be visited by a healer I had found, once a week. What the healer did was to 'take her out or herself' for half an hour, every week. I shall never forget the look on my loved one's face when she was receiving healing. She was at peace, in her own special calm place.

Spiritual healers are not linked to any one faith; our healer was a fantastic guy who, in my opinion, helped my special person in ways I can't describe. The website for the National Federation of Spiritual Healers is http://www.nfsh.org.uk/ . There is a link on the site where you can find healers in your area. Incidentally, our healer visited my special person for about eight months, once a week...and charged nothing. Many charge little or no fee.

James, you seem like a lovely chap who loves his family....you're already doing all the right things, I am sure. My thoughts are with you all.


x


angel h
the best thing you can do for her is be brave, even if you're scared or worried don't let it show because it might cause her to be more worried. Offer her a shoulder to cry on when she needs it, do research for her, reassure her and just be there whenever she needs a friend or a sibling.


juneaulady
Call her, be with her. Just listen. Be there for her.

My thoughts are with you and I wish you both all the best.


baldyhugsblues
Rating
just spend some time with her, call her let your sister know that she can talk to you and be able to rely on you for a shoulder to cry on


MimC
Rating
Spend as much time with her as possible, you won't regret it. She needs your support.


charmel5496
Rating
just go be with her...talk about things you remember about growing up..don't dwell on the cancer issue unless she wants to talk about it..let her know you are there for her and will be


violinmemories
Rating
Being there for her is the best thing you can do..and being there doesn't necessarily mean in person; call her and leave messages for her (if she isn't up to talking), send her little poems or notes.

I know it is very hard to know what to do for someone with cancer. My dad died July 12, 2006 from a 2 yr battle with esophageal cancer and though I still live with both my parents I wasn't always sure what or how I could help my dad. But, I knew that being there for him was important not just for me but for him too. Dad and I were so close and we always will be. I could usually tell how he felt, on his good days - I would climb into my parents bed with him and we'd lay there watching TV, or we'd talk about everything and anything. Mainly, I was just there to listen to him, most times the talks were happy and cheerful, but on occasion the talks would be about his fears, his concerns. I know that when he was hospitalized for the last time, mom and I would spend all the time we could with him. I'd spend most of the day with him and mom would come in after work and spend the rest of the time with him. As time got closer to the end - we were there round the clock with him (the floor he was on was the cancer floor and they had relaxed rules about visiting and staying). As difficult as it was for me to see him slip away, I knew that he could still sense my presence and it gave me comfort to know that he could relax knowing mom, myself or my 21 yr old sister and 20 yr old brother were there with him.

You and your sister are in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time.


ThElL
Be with her she needs more than any other moment, make her know that you love her and you are with her!!!!!!!


Guineapig
Rating
Thanks to Sharman's answer - really useful stuff there.

I have stage 4 bowel cancer which must have started after 1997 when I had my gall bladder removed and then I read there is a 16% increase in the chance of getting bowel cancer if you have your gall bladder removed!

Was finally diagnosed in June 2002, had surgery and then 6 months chemo. All was well until September 2005 when a check up CT scan discovered at least 5 very small tumours across both lungs and another in my liver rather larger. Had another 6 months of chemo, then a break for a few months when the tumours in lungs increased and the one in liver grew a bit, so now on another 6 months of chemo.

I accept that my survival depends on the success of the chemo, and that will be my life from now on, but when they say enough's enough your other organs are rotting, I'm equipped ready with apricot kernels and a grinder. I know people who have been cured with this treatment and the power of positive thought.

'It's not about the bike' by Lance Percival is a good read from the man who went on to win the Tour de France 7 times after beating Stage 4 testicular cancer.

When I stop posting you'll all know I've lost the battle - but I'm not planning on letting that happen!!

My mum's 98 in July and has had breast cancer 3 times since age 71 and a mastectomy at 91 - she drinks Allo Vera juice every day! St Jude is a good guardian angel to adopt as well - the patron saint of lost causes and hopeless cases - search on the www for the novena prayer if you're interested.

Love to you and your sister and I will think positive thoughts for her.


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